Tilt a whirl

This roller coaster of life sure is fun, eh. Up, down, hard rights and lefts, Just when you think it's all downhill, that's when the labor of Sisyphus comes round.Again. I guess we learn from our trials, that's what "they" say, but it seems there is always more to learn. Growth can be painful, and awkward, most times it is forced upon us, rather than by choice. Is that free will thing popping up again?

I say this because the world and its inhabitants are all on the edge of a precipice that has no bottom, the closest feeling I have is of 9-11, and just on our doorstep now. I have felt this kind of spiritual pressure once before, on that world changing day of September 11th 2001. The true day of my birth and most likely the day of your true birth as well. Like a spiral the day comes round again, exponentially stronger for the elapsed time. The chessboard is set, and the pieces are in motion,  The very earth is bursting from the projected feelings of humanity, anger, mistrust and greed. The parent emotion of desire holds sway now, we all want ours' eh? It has really come to this, our darkest thoughts of teotwawki. It may not happen on that dark day, but rest assured it is here.

"As above, so below" my path has brought me to this precipice also. My path has mirrored yours, though we know each other not. I am facing a Rubicon of spirit that may well be my end. We will see. I pray that we will see. I have coined a phrase," when you search for heaven, you will find hell first," because of my "choices?". I take responsibility for what I have done, it breaks my heart to view myself with clarity, but I will say also in my defense that I have done the best I am capable of, and with loving intent. The natural man and I have a scheduled fight this weekend. I am not backing down. Either him or "I" will be back, to face whatever wreckage remains. peace.


 round and round we go